Many people who call me are considering whether to file and server their spouse or to try to negotiate first.
They’ve already lived through the false starts. The awkward holidays. The night-time math. The talks that begin calmly and somehow end in someone standing in the kitchen saying, “I can’t keep doing this.”
So when they finally reach me, they want movement. Filing feels like movement. It has a date. A receipt. A court file. Whether you are in Nassau, Suffolk, or Queens County, it means something real has finally been started, and after months, or years, of private misery, I understand why that feels good.
Still, filing first doesn’t automatically hand you the house, custody, or the better financial deal. It also doesn’t automatically speed up the process of getting everything “figured out”.
A court in New York still divides marital property using equitable distribution, which means the court looks at fairness under the statute, including what counts as marital and separate property. That takes time. Custody agreements do too, since decisions focus on the child’s best interests, not which parent got to the court first. Continue reading ›
Long Island Family Law and Mediation Blog


For couples all across New York, and Long Island, divorce mediation services have emerged as a valuable, effective alternative to traditional litigation processes.
The end of a marriage is difficult for any couple to navigate. Whether you’ve spent months or years with your partner, untangling your life, working out child custody, parenting time, child support, maintenance (alimony) and assets from theirs can be extremely complex. Often, the first step in streamlining the process, is choosing the right strategy.
Divorce is always a complex process, but sometimes having a certain level of control over how you approach the journey can make it a lot simpler to manage. For some couples, traditional litigation procedures may be the best, and most effective way to sever the ties created by a marriage.
In the right circumstances, divorce mediation can be an excellent way for couples in Rensselaer County to come to terms about how they want to navigate the end of their marriage. While litigation is an extremely effective option, which can be necessary in certain circumstances, when alternative dispute resolution options aren’t appropriate, mediation offers numerous benefits.
Though the litigation process can be extremely effective, and sometime essential in certain cases, alternative dispute resolution methods have grown increasingly popular over the users. Divorce mediation, for instance, can offer couples a more comfortable way to make decisions at the end of their marriage, eliminating or reducing the time spent in court rooms, or presenting information to judges.
Divorce mediation is one of the most popular forms of alternative dispute resolution, and a process I recommend considering for New Yorker’s contemplating dissolving their marriage. In an article referenced on Mediate.com it was stated that studies have shown that mediation can drive amicable resolutions in around
Relationships can end for a variety of reasons, but even if the split is amicable, most couples want to part ways with a dispute resolution method that’s as painful and convenient as possible.
Just as there’s no such thing as a one-size-fits-all marriage, there’s no single process for navigating a divorce that works for everyone. While some couples find the only way to effectively negotiate the end of their relationship is with the help of a litigation attorney (which I am), others prefer the flexibility and comfort offered by mediation services (which is my favorite process for people that are able to do it). In recent years, divorce mediation has grown increasingly popular.
Just as every marriage is different, each divorce process has its own unique nuances to consider.